Who Are We WHEN Someone's Looking? (for believer "Gathering" service)
-Morgan Young 6.24.01
One of the things I always feel is unique about a Gathering service is the fact that this service is designed with believers in mind. So as I was trying to get a grip on what to share tonight, I kept asking, "What is it that we as Christ followers need to hear?"
Well, I noticed one of those clever signs on a church; you know, the big white plastic letters that are stuck in tight rolls of black felt. It said, "WHO ARE YOU WHEN NO ONE'S LOOKING?" Which is a take off on the same book by Bill Hybels.
So I saw that sign and thought about us, the people of this church who've crossed the line, the core, the Christ followers. And I wondered if for us, a better question might be, "Who are we when people are looking?"
So tonight I want us to reflect on who we are when we're here, at church and who we are the rest of the week, outside the church. Let's look at who we are inside the church first.
Over the years, our music team has had regular meetings and one of the things we've talked about repeatedly is that when we're not on the stage on Sunday, people still know who we are. Whether we're out in the foyer, or in Krogers, or down at the little league ball park, people will recognize who we are regardless if we know who they are. Whether we're aware of it or not, people recognize us in the foyer and out around the town because they've seen us up here.
And what we've always impressed upon each other is the responsibility that goes along with serving. That when we stand up here, we're taking a stand for Christ that translates into any place people find us.
And last week I was talking with my wife, Sandra, who heads up the Greeters ministry. She was getting my input on things that need to be communicated to that team. And in the course of that conversation I said something to the affect of,
"I wonder if the greeters are aware that after the service, when they're no longer greeting, as we're all running the gauntlet in the hallway, rounding up kids, and getting our names on sign up sheets; I wonder if they realize that seekers they greeted on the way in, still recognize them as that person. And are they just as friendly when they're off duty as when their at their post? In other words, do the greeters know that in the context of ministry you can never clock out?"
Now let's take that a step further. If you're a seeker at OakBrook, after coming for a while, you get a pretty good idea of who the regulars are, the Christ followers. It's the same dynamic as the first couple weeks of high school. When we were freshmen, we could all tell who the other freshmen were and who were the upperclassmen.
It's kind of the same dynamic at church but with less tell-tale acne. If we are Christ followers we are the upperclassmen. We are the people seekers will watch to see how things are done. They will draw conclusions about this church and about Christianity to varying degrees based on their observations of us.
So dig this: if we're Christ followers, we're always on the clock. We're always a representative of the faith and of the Father. Hence the question, "Who are we when people are looking?"
So first off, I'd just like to ask us some rhetorical questions that I'm not trying to guilt us with, but I want to ask these out of a spirit of a healthy and honest awareness. And in the spirit of our Experiencing God series, when I ask these questions, some of us may hear God speak saying, "I am well pleased."
And some of us may hear God speak through the awkward feeling of conviction. And conviction is a great and positive voice God uses to redirect us.
So here we go. Some questions for OakBrook's upperclassmen:
When we walk the halls do we avoid eye contact with people so we won't have to figure out what to say on the fly? Or because we still can't remember their name?
After a congregational song when the worship leader asks us to say "hi" to someone before sitting down; do we shake the hand of the person we came with, or do we look for a fresh face and give them our smile?
When we see someone in the foyer with a wrinkled brow who looks confused or in search of something, do we just smile at them, or do we stop long enough to offer a hand?
Last one. When we see someone we have seen repeatedly around here, and maybe even said "hi" to; do we sacrifice the 120 seconds and some personal awkwardness and introduce ourselves and finally learn their name?
OK, the inquisition is over! So why am I taking time to bring these little things to our attention?
Because these "little" things communicate something big & important to seekers; that we know they exist and that we care that they're here. A personal non-threatening touch is a BIG thing! Look at it again from a high school paradigm. When we were freshmen, it mattered when an upperclassman said "hi" to us; it made us feel accepted and that we were important. It works the same way around here. You with me?
Since we're talking about friendliness in general, let me ask you another question. Who determines the personality of a church? Or more specifically, who determines the personality of OakBrook? (WE DO!)
In high school it was the sophomores, juniors and seniors who determined what the personality of the school was like. Freshmen never determine the personality, instead new people follow suit.
At OakBrook, WE determine whether this church has a warm or a sterile personality. And the seekers will follow suit or worse, will choose to seek elsewhere based on the relational tone or vibe that we set.
As upperclassmen, I want to remind us that God has made this a large church. But I don't believe God or any of us would want a seeker to drive home from a Sunday morning service with the overwhelming feeling of "Wow that church sure was Big!" Or, "Wow, there sure were a lot of people there!"
I'm sure we all agree that we would like people to say as they drive home things about OakBrook's personality, like:
"I felt it was a warm church." Or, "There were a lot of people there, but they were friendly." Or, "It's big in size, but it's small in feel."
Friends, we must realize that how seekers feel about this church's personality has less to do with what happens up here on this stage and EVERYTHING to do with what happens out there, in the hallways, foyer and parking lot.
Listen to me. The personality of OakBrook is the sum of all the smiles, handshakes, greetings and conversations that we initiate and respond to.
Every little exchange we offer or don't offer is tallied consciously or subconsciously by all of the seekers we walk by and around every week. You with me?
And please let us not miss the most important point in this. Because this is not a talk on "tips for church etiquette" by Miss Manners. Earlier I said, if we're Christ followers, we're always a representative of Christ. Who does Christ care about? He cares about all of his children, and especially the lost.
By extending our hand, by us initiating a conversation, by offering our help to someone who looks confused; we are displaying Christ's concern and acknowledgment to seekers and people new to OakBrook. WE are all Christ's Welcome Wagon team. Seekers may say "That church felt warm," but that statement is more accurately translated, "I felt the love of Christ in that building."
Let me wrap this section with a couple things: We always want seekers to enjoy the freedom to check out God and this church at their own pace. So I hope you didn't hear me saying we need to be confrontational with people that are just kicking the tires of Christianity. But, this more of a reminder that even tire kickers want to be acknowledged and made welcome.
And secondly, I didn't bring this up because I think we are horrible in this area. While at the same time, I feel like we can always find room to grow in this area.
And I think when we look at how God is growing this church in the sheer numbers like we did at last month's Gathering. As we grow, we, as the believer's of this body, will have to continually do our part to ensure that this growing church never feels so big that the people God leads here aren't noticed and made to feel welcome. Amen?
Alright. We've been talking about "who we are when people are looking at us," inside the church. Let's take that same concept but, let's look at it outside the church.
Here is something that often goes through my mind; just like last week when I was going through K-Mart getting a kickstand for my son Slater's bicycle. I'll be walking down an isle tracked on whatever's on my mind oblivious to what's going on around me and after I've passed someone I'll here a little voice say, "Did you look at that person or did you intentionally NOT make eye contact?" The voice continues, "What if that person heard you speak at church and now they feel like you didn't even notice them?"
Alright, before I freak you out with my paranoid delusions; my point is, those kinds of thoughts remind me, not of my own vanity, but of the kind of people Christ cares about. Because Christ does care about the person in the isle I'm walking down at K-Mart. He cares about the kids and adults on Slater's t-ball team. The person at the exchange counter at Target. And the kid who messed up your order at McDonald's.
At any given point in our week, we could be having a less than stellar moment or mood for a multitude of reasons, some that are our fault and some through no fault of our own. And at that same moment, whether we realize it or not, we are in view and proximity of people who know we are Christ followers.
What I'm getting at is best summed up with this quote: "Always preach the Gospel...and if necessary use words." For me it's as if God has taken that phrase and put in on a little bumper sticker and stuck it right inside my frontal lobe; so when I roll my eyes back in my head in disgust because someone's annoying the grace out of me, I see, "Always preach the Gospel, and when necessary use words."
It's my little reminder that before I shift into schmuck mode, I'm liable to spill sarcasm onto someone who may walk through those doors for the first time next Sunday. It's my reminder that I'm witnessing about my faith and Savior in ALL I do.
I know over the years, I have been challenged to not compartmentalize my relationship with Christ. Do you know what I mean? It's very easy to act in a certain manner in the context of church or church related activities. It may be not as easy to behave that same way around my brother that I don't get along with. Or when we're running close on our next appointment in the day and the drive-thru line is moving slower than an automatic car wash.
Or how about this one: After a worship set like the one we just experienced, we're full of grace for whoever may need it; but when we are on the edge of being able to tell our spouse "I told you so" we're bearing down on him or her with both barrels like Elmer Fudd on Bugs Bunny!
Outside the church, our friends and our family all know who we are; they know where we go on Sunday mornings and every 4th Friday night of the month. And perhaps the kid at the drive thru who doesn't know you, sees your WWJD bracelet as you snag the bag of fast food from his hand. People around us know we're Christ followers. And how we appear to them makes a statement about Who and what we represent.
In other words, how we interact with those around us IS our witness to them. Whether we realize it, we are continually witnessing to everyone within sight or sound of us.
This quote, "Always preach the Gospel, and if necessary use words," is a paraphrase of Matthew 5:13-16, and here's my favorite version of it from The Message,
"Let me tell you why you are here. You are to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your salty-ness, how will people taste Godliness? Here's another way to put it: You're here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We're going public with thisIf I make you light-bearers, you don't think I'm going to hide you under a bucket do you? I'm putting you on a light stand, shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you'll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven." The Message
How many people like to watch chefs on television? I've always enjoyed watching chefs do their thing. To watch a great chef is more like watching an artist with a culinary palette than just someone cooking food.
Anyway, if we watch a chef in action, to almost every dish, they will add what? A pinch of salt. And when asked why the salt was added, the reply is always the same, "Because it brings out the flavor of the food." So to, we must bring out the God-flavors in all parts of our life.
As Christ followers, we may have a tendency to want to compartmentalize our life, where we act a certain way in one area, but perhaps not in another; but the REALITY is we can't clock out from the Gospel! Christ followers cannot turn off the eyes and ears of those around us. As Christ followers, we live the movie "The Truman Show."
The question is not IF people watch us, the question is only, "What will they see?"
Let me share a true story that a friend of mine shared with me. Let's call him "OakBrook Ollie." My friend is a Christ follower who has a good friend, let's call him "Unchurched Ed," who's not a believer. OakBrook Ollie & Unchurched Ed have known each other since they were just kids. OakBrook Ollie was sharing a little frustration with me that when he hangs out with Unchurched Ed, he tends to talk, not like he does around me, or other people at OakBrook, but like he used to talk, with the kind of words he & his friend grew up with.
He was also sharing some of the awkwardness of getting Unchurched Ed to be receptive to the God stuff. I hit him with the "Always preach the Gospel, and if necessary use words" line. He got his "ah-ha" moment and that was the end of our conversation. After that he and began trying to act in a way that he knew he should around Unchurched Ed.
What we need to understand is when OakBrook Ollie compartmentalized the way he talked around Unchurched Ed, my friend lost his salty-ness. And like the Scripture says, "If you lose your salty-ness, how will people taste Godliness?" And again, that was a while back.
Well the other day OakBrook Ollie gave me an update. He said he & Unchurched Ed were talking and his friend used some colorful language and then immediately apologized.
OakBrook Ollie said, "Heeeey, like we've known each other for ever what's with the apology?" Unchurched Ed said something like, "Well dude, I know how you are trying to do the God thing, so I'm trying to respect that blah, blah, blah."
I tell that story only because it so clearly illustrates that people know who we are, what we're about and that they are paying attention. And the other groovy thing in that story is my friend got his salty-ness back and sprinkled it on his friend without having to initiate a discussion about what kind of words are God-honoring.
That true story shows that we don't witness so much by what we say as by how we live each day.
Here's my admonition to us tonight. Right now I could take a pole and ask everyone who's a Christ follower to raise their hand. But the more revealing question would be something like, "Do our mouths, hands and feet live out actions in the course of the week and month that support that same claim?"
And I hope you don't hear me being any "holier than thou" in that respect. This is one of my daily deals too. It's a tough road to live out what we say we believe. What I want to spur you onto tonight is not being a perfect person, but I want you to be spurred on to becoming a person who is increasingly aware of your influence in every life around you.
And that your witness isn't as much what you tell people, but how you live life every day.
One thing I've done to help in my life is wherever I go be it, the ball park, a restaurant, a department store, my living room; I assume there will be people there that know who I am. Because whether I'm intentional or not, every day my actions are making statements about the Savior that I profess.
God calls all of us to be the "salt-seasoning that brings out the God flavors of this earth."
So how 'bout some more questions.
When we get to work tomorrow and things don't go like we hoped; will we be salty?
When our kid gets called out at home plate this week when he was really safe; will we be salty?
When Beavus serves us a filet o'fish with tarter sauce when we clearly said "without"; will we be salty?
When you are right and your spouse is wrong, and you both know it; will you suck it up and be salty?
When our son or daughter doesn't live up to our expectations; will we be salty?
The next time you get together with your relatives and once again everyone goes down the same petty and dysfunctional road, will you go with them; or will you be salty?
They say that too much salt on food can contribute to high blood pressure. I've taken to the belief that a good dose of salty-ness in our actions makes for Holy blood pressure.
Day by day, whether we're in church or anywhere outside these walls, the best we can do is to realize that in all of our actions we're preaching something. My prayer is that this union of salt-encrusted brothers and sisters add God's spice to all we mix with, this week and every week.
